Relationships can be beautiful once you find the right person you want to be with. Whether it is friendships, family, or significant others. They all have the same thing in common: They involve two or more people. So after much reflection and insight I was able pick up some of the common characteristics that involve failed relationships and what things that can be done to move forward from failed relationships to successful ones.
The first lesson I learned was:
- The Importance of Learning From Your Mistakes:
Like someone I know told me. If I go into another relationship right after leaving my previous one, it would be like driving blindfolded on the expressway. I said EXACTLY! Keep in mind that we are not perfect and therefore, will make mistakes. But what will set you apart from the others is learning from what happened in that failed relationship. Once you have learned what went wrong then you can come up with a plan to execute on how not to go into that situation again.
2. Replace the Habit or Go Back To Failure:
Habits can never be broken. They are stuck in that part of the body called your brain. It is an unconscious response turned automatic. Therefore, if you do not come up with something else to occupy that unhealthy habit that got you into that failed relationship, guess what is going to happen. Yes, you will go back to the failed relationship. But remember, all you have to do is replace the habit with a better one and you will change the failed relationship into successful one. I know it's easier said than done, but I never told you this was going to be easy, now did I.
3. Blaming Them will get you Nowhere:
Like Will Smith stated on his you tube video:
fault vs. responsibility https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USsqkd-E9ag
If you keep finding fault in the relationship you will be stuck being the victim and it will inhibit your own happiness, and isn't being happy what the whole point in having successful relationship is about. So once you figure out your responsibility in the relationship will you then learn from the mistakes and then replace the habit, just add a bit of consistency with the latter and there you go.
You will be on your way to an awesome better relationship than the one you just had.
Challenge of the Week:
Get a journal and for each day write down either: what you learned, a habit you replaced, or what was your responsibility in the relationship that went bad. Then leave a comment below to see what you will do to make sure you move forward into a successful one.
Facebook: Positive Awakenings Counseling Center